200 subscribers later!

figured an appreciation post was due.

I need to start taking pride in the little things I’ve achieved—the things I’ve done because I truly deserve them.

They need to be celebrated, I need to be celebrated.

I think about the very first time I joined Substack, which was maybe around May 16th, and the very first post I read was one of Wunmi’s posts, which was about the insensitivity of Nigerians saying it's never that deep. It was so relatable that I wanted to read more if her works and I remember messaging her and telling her about a similar post I wrote on Medium, so I sent her the link and she read it and she had so many nice things to say about the post that I was overjoyed. It meant I knew how to write a good amount because, I mean LOOK AT WHAT SHE WROTE. You can read that here:

“It's Never That Deep”- The Insensitive Culture of Nigerians & The Obsession With ‘Cruise’

From then on, I made a Substack profile, and I didn't have it in mind to start posting, I just wanted to maybe read some posts and support my friend, because she also writes on substack, and I just wanted to have better assess her work, rather than using the website all the time, so I decided to download it. I never really thought I was going to write posts on it, and I never thought that I would reach this far. So, I am here to say that I have 200 subscribers. A whole 200. The very first post that I made was one of my Medium posts that I copied from Medium and decided to post on Substack, and it had more engagement than it did on Medium. Medium has terrible, terrible, terrible engagement, by the way. You hardly ever receive engagement on Medium, so I decided to transition to Substack. I still have a Medium account, which I use to speak on certain issues, but now I think Substack is my main account, and I hope to expand and get better at writing.

Now I have 200 subscribers by November 2025, and it's not even the end of the year. I was actually planning on having more than 200. I feel like my subscriber count never really adds up as fast as other people's adds up, but I would like to say that sometimes I feel like I owe myself some credit to say that I did try, and the fact that I have 200 people reading what I write has to say something of my writing prowress. So, I figured I would write a post about it, because one day after I had finished playing Isha'i, I had thought about it–all the things I had written, and I thought about how my progress seemed to be on Substack. I never really told God, never really told Ya Rabb about my writing progress, about Substack, but sometimes I feel as if I am in this little corner of the earth where I'm yet to be discovered, even though I know I don't write as good as some of the writers on Substack, some people at least like to read what I write.

There's also the fact that there are so many beautiful people I've met on here. I remember the time I wasn't as active because of exams and all. I received messages from belleâmenoire♤, B.sayo and Muhsinah🌸🎀. It was so heartwarming to see that people actually noticed my absence.

There's Ifeoma (my word lover!) who always restacks quotes from my posts. I like the little things she shares with me. I like the fact that she's such a jovial and fun person to converse with. I like that she calls me Bambito, lol. There's Bisayo, I can always count on her to give out the most beautiful comments because that's how much of a loving person she is. I like how whenever she texts me on Substack she says ‘my loveeeeee!’ There's Radhiyah🌷, that girl and the way she engages in all my notes and posts. She likes everything and she sees everything lol. There's Abdulrahmon who I can always count on to comment and vibe with my posts. Then there's 𝐀𝐁𝐃𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐇☆, even though he's looking for my trouble alot these days. I can't even put how much I love all of them into words.

However, being the overanalyzer that I am, a lot of times I find myself wishing I had more subscribers or wishing I wrote this piece that someone wrote, or thinking about whether I should start writing about trending topics just to get more likes and just to get more subscribers. The constant feeling to be up to par is sickening, and it's all that I seem to think about instead of just writing what I feel, writing what I think about, the thoughts I have, etc, etc. So, I think after a while I will go on a break because this constant…this constant need to be better, this constant comparison always happens whenever I'm on this app. There is never a day that I don't compare myself with other authors, and I think that is a bad thing because I actually have made a certain amount of progress on this app, and that's why I'd like to stop all this constant overthinking, even though I don't want to think about it and my brain still thinks about it. It's always at the back of my mind, the fact that maybe I'm not a great writer, that my progress on substack is so slow, and that's one thing because substack shouldn't really be the reason that I write or be the point of writing or be the thing that I tie my writing capabilities to.

There was one of Bo_Ra’s post I had read about how she started to engage in people's posts and notes and how she started writing for herself. She had said the right community will find you. The day I read that post, I had thought about it for days and decided maybe I'd start doing to, so I liked every note I saw, commented on posts I'd normally wouldn't comment on. It worked for a while, I think. But I'm bot someone that is overly enthusiastic so with time I grew exhausted so I stopped. I left it at that.

Even I'm tired of Substack and it's uncrackable algorithms, it's made me draw competitions between people I don't even know just because of engagement. Stupid engagement.

Recently though, I've decided to make substack my online diary–journalling, oversharing, writing down entries, documenting, writing all the weird ass corny fudge I can think of–as long as I remember to write and not lose the ability to write in the future because only time will tell.

---

Thank you for 200 subscribers, everyone!!! *mic drop, Suga style.*🩷

---